My heart is heavy tonight as our upstairs neighbors are rapidly becoming a statistic. I am referring to a divorce. My mind is completely a blank as I try to imagine how a couple who were just married in August of last year can be ending their marriage after only five months.
This evening we came home to our neighbor, *Sam, packing his car. With much confusion, Chris and I looked at each other. As he walked down the stairs, Sam said with obvious disdain in his voice, "I'm moving. We're getting a divorce". Just like that. As I stood there baffled, all I could stutter were a few "I'm so sorry's" and uncomfortably shuffled inside. A moment later Sam came knocking on our door and for about 20 minutes he stood there telling us about the problems he and his wife have been having the last few months. Months! Didn't they just get married! For the sake of their privacy, I will not disclose the details, but I can tell you that my heart is hurting for both of them right now.
Let me take you back to the weekend we moved Chris into our apartment. It was a beautiful, sunny day in May and I was as giddy as could be. Our neighbors, Sam and *Amy were very quick to introduce themselves and give us all of the useful tips we could possibly need. We instantly felt at home. The four of us shared how we were both getting married later in the year. The best thing about them was how much they LOVED Abby and better yet, she loved them. Whenever they walk by our patio, they coo over Abby as she slobbers all over their happy faces.
So what went wrong? Did they think getting married would make everything better? Change their financial situation? Make them stop fighting?
I can only give my own humble thoughts about this sad situation. It's got me thinking about marriage and how the world view's this union with such shallow sentiment.
My mind goes back to June 21; our wedding day. I can remember the vows exchanged between my husband and myself and I can assure you that they were not made out of mere loving feelings and hopes that we would always have butterflies for each other. I will say this one time and let me make myself very clear...Marriage is a PROMISE and not to be taken lightly! I hope it has never been unclear that while I post blogs about our love and how lucky we are to have each other, our life is not perfect and we have difficult times like everyone else. However, we have made a choice to stick together through those rough patches. We will not give up on our marriage when (I say when and not if) things get hard. Why do so many couples miss that? What is it about our culture that makes us feel so entitled to comfort?
Forgive my rant, but I find it hard to understand how half of all marriages end in divorce. The only conclusion I can come to is this: Marriage was meant to be between three people. Husband, Wife and God. He must be the rock on which we build our foundation or it will crumble.
Please don't disregard me as an ignorant newlywed, but rather a woman who seeks to make the Lord my first Love and my husband my second. We are all capable of the same choices, which is why we must fix our eyes on the Lord. If anything, please take away that I believe marriage is a loving commitment intended to last until we leave this world.
*Names have been changed for privacy